I often speak about, and I am often asked about what makes a good leader. One of the programs I offer speaks about this very issue, and I will share some highlights of that program here with you.

I truly believe that we become the sum total of all of the leaders and teachers who have influenced our lives in either a good or a bad way. We might have said “Gee, I want to be like that, or said I hope I never turn out like that!” I think that we all know that we take on the charachteristics of those who have influenced us, but it is how we assemble these traits and truly use them in our everyday decision making process.

In order to begin this thought process of thinking like a leader, I ask each one of you to write down five leaders that have affected you either positive or negatively.

The next step always raises a few eyebrows, but here it is….Write a note or an e-mail to the persons listed thanking them for what they have done. If the person has past on, then write a note to a son or daughter that remains and tell them what legacy their love one has left.

Pretty powerful stuff , Huh? I am certain that only a small percentage of you will actually do this but it is an important dramatic step in your life and it will give you very positive feelings to start your leadership journey.

Of the leaders that you listed, do you see some common traits in all of them. They all have common strengths, but their individual weakness all vary. I want you to now take a look at the above named leaders and identify their one weak point or trait. Sometimes when we view role models we don’t see their weaknesses.

Another facet of what a leader has to do involves conflict resolution.

Some basic tips that relate to conflict resolution are:

Separate the people from the problem.

Focus on interests not positions.

Generate a variety of options before deciding.

Seek and use objective standards for your decision making.

Leadership is a multi-faceted concept. Although leadership skills can be taught they are best learned through experience.

If you aspire to become a good leader, pick up traits from the good leaders you know and try to apply them in your everyday dealings with others. When dealing with conflicts use the steps above to get to the real problem facing you, not just the symptom.

Pete Lamb
Copyright 2013

This week I am revisiting something that can help you be a good leader, or. A good firefighter.

OK so before you think I have snapped and wonder what the hell I am talking about let me at least get the explanation out before you stop reading!

Many years ago in a book called Managing People (now out of print I believe) , there was a small segment about this and my reference for this week is that and my own twisted opinions.

The simple premise is that everyone’s personality has two facets to it. The things you know about yourself and the things that everyone knows about you. Think about that for a minute and re-read it so you see where we are going.

The book then breaks it down a little further and says that the things that you know about yourself and the things others know about you that are common are called the Arena. This is your open personality. These are the features of your personality that you and all others that contact you agree upon.

There are then those things that we know about ourselves that are unknown to others. This area is appropriately called the Facade. Think of this as a house where the blinds are drawn. People know something is going on within you but not exactly what.

The third area deserves some focus and that is what I wished to point out this week, The third area is a blind spot. This is a part of us that others know about us but we have little or no idea of it. You might think you are an excellent communicator, well liked and respected. Others find you pushy, you talk too much and can’t be trusted.

The blind spot is an area that you have to try to reflect on more and more so that you will interact better with others.

The last segment is the Unknown. This is an area that you don’t know about yourself and others do not know about you. This is a situation when you try a new task or work under severe pressure for the first time, people don’t know how you will react or handle anything nor do you for that matter.

The real principle is actually much more simple. The more genuine you are and the more people you allow into your Arena, the more you will be more accepted by others.

Take a look inside yourself this week and try to think how you are perceived by others.

Take a look at the textbook Managing People if you have it. Re-read it if it has been awhile. There is nothing more important than the people who you surround yourself with.

It will do some good!

Pete Lamb
Copyright 2013